Love Like No Other

Dear Sweet Baby Lipsey,

Welcome to fetushood! 9 weeks and 1 day ago, the Lord spoke you into existence and blessed us with the most precious gift of your life. I'm crying just thinking about it. About you. About the abundant grace of our Savior and how He loves US. Your daddy and I are just so happy. Overjoyed. I've heard that term so many times and never thought I'd feel it myself, but here we are. You're a tiny, precious ball of perfection with eye-lids, teeth, and fingernails, and though I can't see you or literally feel you, I carry you right in my heart. You, little one, are always on my mind. Everything that happens in my life requires careful consideration of how it will affect you first. My heart is so full it feels like it just may burst, and I know that the love I feel for you will only be magnified as we move closer to your birth and your life outside of me. I simultaneously look forward to and dread that day...I can't wait to hold you in my arms and share you with the world, but I also want to keep you right with me so I can keep you safe.

I have often wondered what I would want to tell you first when you're here. I'm sure that on the day of your birth neither of us will be up for one of my classic lectures, so I'll just have it all here for you when the time comes and you want to know how things were before you were born.

I want you to know how much you're loved, sweet baby, because you are oh so loved. I love you so much that it hurts. And I've loved you as long as I can remember--long before your 9 weeks of existence began, even before I met your daddy. I have always, always wanted to be your mommy, and I can't believe that time has finally come! How blessed we are, little one!! Your daddy loves you too. Though he's more subtle and less wordy than I am, I know you will always know that he loves you. You'll see it in the way he looks at you and in that smile he reserves for those of us he loves the most. You'll know because your daddy shows his love by performing acts of service...he will do things for you that you may not even deserve. He will be such a good daddy to you, my darling. I'll try not to be jealous when he becomes wrapped around your finger instead of my own. We are so very lucky to have him. He wasn't an easy catch, but he was worth the wait, just as you will be. My greatest prayer is that you are more like him than you are like me because he is a beautiful, wonderful person. We are blessed to share a life with this man, just wait and you'll see.

I need you to know how much God loves you, baby. He created you from nothing, my little miracle. When the doctors said no, God said yes! He surprised us all by breathing life where there was none and placing you in an empty space to prepare you for this world. He has a purpose for you, precious, and for me. You, weighing in at less than an ounce, are my most powerful testimony, and I cannot wait to share our story with the world! One day when you're older and want to know where babies come from I will go into more detail, but for now I just want you to know how truly special you are. When my body wouldn't do the ONE thing I needed to get you here, God brought you here to me anyway. I know that is difficult to process, because it is for me, but all I need you to learn from that right now is that you are LOVED. So loved that you exist when science said you shouldn't. God is sovereign, precious one, and He loves you. Once again I say we are blessed! My prayer is that you will come to know Him and to love Him as well, and that I will be able to honor Him while parenting you the way I should.

I can't end this letter without noting that we are not the only people who love you. You've got a ton of grandparents and great-grandparents, a few aunts and uncles, and some very special friends who love you, too. You have been loved on and prayed for so long already! I can't wait for you to come into this world and experience all the love and cuddles we've set aside for you. Stay in there long enough to be healthy, though, mommy doesn't want you out to soon! I can't wait to meet you!

All my love for all my life,
Mommy

PS: Your daddy's daddy (who thinks you're going to call him Mr. Lipsey Sir, but you're totally not) has requested we name you Clinkscale after his most favorite cat. As a compromise we will be calling you Clinkscale on this blog until we know your name for real. I hope you don't hate me for this when you're a teenager. If so, please direct all complaints to Sharpsburg at your "Mr. Lipsey Sir."