Plateau

What an ugly word. I had to spell check it three different places to make sure I wasn't wrong. My weightloss/diet has plateaud. And its really rubbing me the wrong way. My hormones have also been kind of a trainwreck so other things have also been rubbing me the wrong way. And despite the fact that I'm actually in a good mood right now, I'd love to share these things with you in a list because lists do not and will not rub me the wrong way.

Angry and Annoying Things September 25, 2011
1. People asking me when I'm going to reproduce. If you were around me 24/7 you'd probably find yourself asking me not to reproduce instead. I am selfish and moody and in no way ready to care for a tiny human. Sometimes I get all oooh and ahhh because babies are (typically) really cute, but if there's anything I can do about it there will be no ooohs or ahhhs or other annoying coo sounds pointed in my direction anytime soon. For example, right now I think pregnancy sounds awesome because I'm dieting and I think pregnancy is a good reason to get fat...plus I'm weird/creepy and have always been obsessed over the anatomical happenings involved in making a kid. End rant.
2. Procrastinating. I thought it would be different this time around but I'm blogging instead of studying for Tuesday's test so we all know better, don't we? End rant.
3. People giving up, specifically on their health and living life in general. You are not dead yet, at least if you're reading this. If you're reading and are dead, please leave a comment so that I may call myself a psychic medium and get a show on TLC (If this happens I might recant #1 because I'll probably have a kid to boost ratings...the profit from my show would probably pay for said kid's therapy down the road, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it). I digress. I have seen so many folks just accepting their fate and I feel this is completely unreasonable. FIGHT. You can best believe I won't go down without kicking and screaming and possibly losing a few organs in the process. HEALTH PROMOTION PEOPLE! If you know you're prone to heart disease, put down the freakin Big Mac, don't just say "well my daddy and his daddy and his daddy all had heart attacks at 59, so I probably don't have much longer." I felt this way before school, but now that I'm aware of what a huge part of nursing health promotion is, you can best believe I will be cramming it down your throat. You can thank me when you die at 102 and start talking to me through my blog. End rant.
4. The death penalty. I'm pissed that we killed a man this week because there was reasonable doubt (judging from what I've heard/read/watched, I know I'm no expert please don't start throwing legal jargon at me) about whether or not he even did it. However, I'd be pissed even if he admitted it and had DNA all over the place and all the other things that would take away said reasonable doubt. Call me a flaming liberal if you want, but I do not believe in nor agree with the death penalty. I find it barbaric and ridiculous. I would rather them take part of my hard-earned money (this isn't true at the moment, I'm unemployed but the fact remains) to pay for all of these criminals to be in jail for life than to "humanely" kill a person with lethal injection. If it were me I'd suffer more by having to remember and relive a crime everyday in my jail cell than if you gave me the easy way out and put me to death. Of course I don't have a criminal mind, but I do feel bad for days for tiny, insignificant things I do wrong...like hoping a fellow student fails out because I wouldn't trust her to take care of my sickly family member. Can we please not kill people anymore? Feel free to hate on me and leave commentary about how much you agree with killing people in the comment section...I like hearing perspectives. End rant.
5. Not making your wishes known. I was talking to a friend who knows someone with a spouse on hospice that refuses to accept their death or tell their spouse what they want to happen with their body/money/possessions/etc when they pass on. This isn't fair folks. It adds more burden to the person left behind because not only are they sad and missing you, they have to figure out what you PROBABLY (no confirmation here) wanted done with your body. RUDE. I know its not fun to think about and my mom is probably shaking her head and calling me negative as she reads this, but this is important. So, witnesses young and old and possibly dead (see point #3) here are my post-mortem wishes: If possible, donate all of my organs. Skin me, take out my eyeballs, take it all as long as somebody else can use it. If I can't help people live, donate me to science. Let some future doctors cut me apart to learn anatomy so they can save somebody later. I don't care where my body goes when donated as long as you don't send me to the University of Tennessee. I DO NOT WANT TO GO THERE and it has nothing to do with how much I truly hate that ugly orange and the volunteers. Their lab is a decomposition lab and I don't want that. Cut me apart but don't let me decompose in the woods....mainly because I don't want snakes around. I've heard science is picky so if I'm too messed up for them, cremate me and scatter me somewhere and be done with it. No sad funeral videos or my dead body laid out in a casket and no idiots talking about how good and peaceful my dead self looks. If you want a memorial that's fine, do it in Chatsworth because I don't have enough people here to come, and please play Ding Dong the Witch is Dead. I'm serious, don't sob. I'll be rejoicing with the Lord and I won't really care where you put my body in a box in the ground. Honor my wishes or I'll haunt you. End rant.   
6. Kids that look/act/talk/dress like they're grown. Mainly girls. Dress your babies like they're babies and not like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman! This is why I want boy spawn and instead of girl. Girls start rolling their t-shirts up to show their bellies when they're like 6 these days and boys wear polo shirts and khakis from the time they're born til they're in the nursing home! So much easier! Let the kids be kids until they can't be anymore or they'll regret it when they're older and probably hold it against you. Hubby and I think that perhaps television is to be blamed for certain adult-like behaviors so we cut off our cable...not true, we cut off our cable because we don't like paying for it when we only watch 1 hour a week, but we are elders at heart and blame it on TV and that darn rap music. I am 99% sure Tyler will shake his head here when he reads this. Let kids be kids and wear clothing that makes them look their age! End rant.
7. Diet plateaus. If I'm working just as hard to eat crappy food (ok not crappy but subpar) then I should still be losing weight. Skinny is good, but I would really like to be skinnier. If I keep not losing I'll start eating like fatty patty again and all of my "hard work" will be in vain. End rant.

I'm pretty sure that I faced more annoying things this week, but I'm tired and 3 episodes away from finishing the LOST series so I must go spend time with Tyler, Desmond (my favorite character if you're curious), and the gang. Hope you're not offended by my rants and if you are that you leave me a comment!

XOXO,
Hannah the potential flaming liberal/psychic medium